Well it's nearly a month later, but I will tell you now that I was inspired by some of you to check out the 2018 remake of "Suspiria" on Halloween. I loved Argento's original, but was prepared for a very different take on the subject matter. Other than that, I didn't research it much before watching, but I saw that people tend to either love it or hate it. So I ran down to the Redbox, bought some chips, and popped it in. Without giving any spoilers, here's my impression:
To be blunt, I found it tedious and boring. To me it wasn't scary or suspenseful, just gross/disturbing for a few scenes. I enjoy '60s and '70s arthouse cinema that plays with cinematic conventions, but the extent of "Look at how different I am!" in this one is pretty glaring. Like the title cards for each "chapter." And the fact that half of the movie was in German for no reason. Now, I'm nearly fluent in German, but I still found it jarring the way they kept switching languages all the time. The cinematography was generally dark and void of contrast (on purpose), but it honestly made it hard to see what was going on in some scenes. This was probably all intentional, but it didn't lead to a pleasant viewing experience for me. I guess I was looking for some easy viewing that was a little more... chill.
And while the 1977 original is often criticized for having "no plot," this version has way too much going on for me. How many sub-plots do we need? What is this, some kind of grand epic? With a running time of nearly three (3) hours, I guess that's what they were going for... But in my opinion, a lot of it would've been better as "deleted scenes" in the bonus section, because they just slowed down the pacing so much. I felt like I was watching some scenes in slow motion because of how they dragged on. Again, this was probably intentional on the part of the filmmakers, but it soon began to try my patience.
So that's why I wasn't into it. But I'm curious, for those people that love this version, what did it for you? Did you just like the gross/disturbing stuff, or were there specific aspects of the film that you found captivating? Would be interested to hear others' reactions.